I told my mom i don t love her reddit So, just talk to him. you're my best friend, after all". Saying you love them is just that: it’s saying it. they divorced when I was 3 and my mom moved to another state. I told my dad that I don’t feel comfortable living with SM after everything she said and done to me over the years, and I’m not sure I can handle being around her cause I don’t trust her. "I'll tell her myself" - - - fuck that, I ain't dyin' tonight; I'll tell her myself. we live with my 72 yr old mom due to mom’s health. It was a bit eerie. I told her tonight that I may have to move for work and she flipped out. However, I did share how much I love her and how I felt bad leaving her but I needed this for my own health. She wasnjusy doing her best. You can reassure her a bit, of course, but after that stop and she has to figure it out herself. The affair damage was also on my friend’s end as well. Steve eventually told me to get off of Reddit because he hated That must feel so lonely. I don't think he told her that I warned him, thankfully. I call her most days and we always say "i love you" at the end of the call. How they started texting each other. don’t make her pay bills, except her note & It was my birthday 6 days ago, and I got a call from my mom where she told me how disappointed she was in me and how I won't be getting a gift because of my "bad behaviour", I told her to call me when I gave two shits about her and told her to disown me, she immediately cut the call and 2 hours later, my grandparents came into my room and told Her DMs, two days worth because I don't really use my Facebook, consistented of her saying I abandoned her when she needed me most, that she's practically a single mom, her husband (my ex) hates her and got with a woman that looks like me, our parents blame her for me leaving and won't help her, and the entire family treats her kid like crap I asked her to tell me everything. Instead all I see is a room mate and a friend. ” He died soon after telling me he never wanted me. I don't even like visiting her cause its like I don't belong with her and her fiancee but I went cause I thought that she wanted to see me and I miss her a lot every day. For background, I was abandoned by my birth It isn't even true (that I don't love her), I just wish she could be a mom that I want to love, the one that I wanted when I was little. B: I don't want to look like her because I don't think she's attractive and so I'm ugly. i’m 25F and i may not have kids but my mom ruined my life too for other reasons and i feel you so much right now. My High School Bestie Lied About His Life #reddit #askreddit #redditstories #redditreadings #redditcomments #redditstorytime #storytime My mom is so mentally sick rn she just sent me and my sisters EACH $700, texted me begging to live w me and give me her car. YES x100000. I don't think she ever says that in the song though. I don't know when it started, but I started finding myself not wanting to spend time with her at all. I’ve tried to be the best I can be for them and try to resolve this by myself but I just don’t think it’s working. It just confuses her and sends mixed messages. I don't know where people are getting that I've completely forgiven my dad but I don't. he never wanted kids, and my mom always did. My mom and dad do a lot for me so I know they “love” me but I don’t think they like me. Just tell your mom you know, but don’t tell her how. She resents and fears your easy radical solution, of you just taking the love you deserve without masochistically self harming yourself for the "sake of the family" because deep down the broken inner child within her would have loved to have joined you in that rebellion, but now she feels it is too late for her to learn to love herself, something that would have got her annihilated by her All my life I've been a coward, this time I wasn't ready to live with the regret to not have told her how I felt, so I told her about a month ago that I have feelings for her, and she ghosted me instantly, I told her I couldn't stay stuck and if she wanted to end it then I'd respect that, still no response, so I decided to end it, when I said goodbye she texted me to shut up and said give If I told her, I don’t want to be lecture and I don’t want her to try to convert my boyfriend. But I also didn’t respond to her shit by being a shit back to her. 100% Now, you need to have the discussion with him that while you have times where you don't like him, you will always love him. But nope! The next day, she's like, "Guess what? My boyfriend can do your I mean, I could see myself saying that. You don’t have to tell her what she wants to hear. Don't pressure her into giving a specific answer; just let her know that you care about her and that you want to know what she's thinking. She's the kind of woman who has so much layers to her personality that are all so exciting to navigate. Of course I consider her my mom I just don’t say that when trying to get her attention or anything. I may have been harsh even if I believe it is true and that can make me the asshole, but she is really pushing for a relationship that’s not going to happen Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Earlier this year, my mom told almost 40 year old me to give my uncle a hug. I think it’s time now to tell her but I’ve realized I’m not as in tune with expressing myself as I thought. She lived with her 2 biological parents from her childhood to her teen years. I have a younger sister and I don’t care about her at all. She talks my ears off then says I don't care about her. I did a lot of thinking on my own and I realized, I don't love her anymore, and I Perhaps you want to believe that you love them, but you don’t. Society isn't colorblind, and her experiences would inform her responses and inclinations to believe and support her mom. We spoke about arrangements and knowing my dad still loves my SM and I didn’t want him to choose between us, i told him that I could talk to Coach if I could stay with him, and after calling him Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. But ultimately no. I treated her with kindness and love. I'm gonna call my mom when she wakes up and tell her inlove her. I told my mom about this a few months back and she told me that even though both her parents passed away, she isn't as sad because she has her husband (my dad) and her kids (me and my bro) to make her life complete. Well, I would say you do love your girlfriend, but you are not in love with her. she has plenty of money and a great home, which by the way she kicked me out of and i was going to be homeless thankfully my boyfriend let me stay with him, now i’m so drained Im speaking for someone else here, not myself. Although I don’t have strong feelings for her or anyone for that matter I can appreciate what people do for me and thus reciprocate it in that sense. And you find them irritating now that you have your biological daughter. Not now, not ever. My mom and I dont have the best relationship, but I will say that I thank my lucky stars that I do not have a relationship like she had with her mom (my grandmother). When I was 13 my mom forced me to tell my dad something I’d ‘done with an older man. This made me think of all the times I went to my mommy crying and asking why my daddy didn't love me. This is what I told her: Mom, I know that you're more just my mom. I genuinely don Last-minute I was going to buy her a treat, but she wouldn't get off the floor, she was kneeling/sitting on the floor asking me to carry her (not something I do) I told her, no she needed to get up and if she didn't I would not buy the item, we would just leave. She has told me my entire life that her love for me is unconditional, but that my love for I no longer have a relationship with my mother. You're NTA for that. She can give you the silent treatment if she wants to. She works as an event manager. Original post by u/Prestigious_Branch80 in r/AITAH ** . I don’t want her to stay in my house, but she home schools our kids. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. she’s my clone too. Don't know why. . And the health insurance helps SO MUCH. Gaming She’s like “oh but they don’t charge u interest” when I tell u I wanted to shake her thru the phone. It kind of makes me a little sad saying this but I think I don’t love her anymore. He basically cheated on my mom with their high school “best friend”. Why don't you tell I can relate so much. On the flip side, if I don’t tell her, I feel like it would really hurt her down the line and potentially my boyfriend as well. This is the normal reason for cheating. The empty threats of divorce. I just don't know what's going on and what I can even do. I gave up by age 7. Maybe his spouse doesn’t turn him on as much anymore. i was eating the dinner and talking to my family and my mom rolled her eyes at everything i said. she said her mom knows she’s talking to me. My husband blew up and told me "If my wife came back from the dead I would divorce you in an instant for her, don't act so high and mighty because you help MY son with homework sometimes or build stupid plastic figurines, no matter how many bed time stories you read him you are not and will never be his mother. Hey ma and pa. You don’t just wake up “not in love” anymore. Not only did your mom use the whole I love you phrase wrong ( it’s not supposed to be but I don’t like you; you don’t like the behavior is what it was intended to be), but it sounds like she had some other parenting fails based on your descriptions. If they have an emergency they can always count on me to help, if she has a death in the family, I will console her. My life got better when I finally accepted that this is the mother I got. Yet I still have a similar reaction. Or check it out in the app stores we had an argument and she complained about how i'm not spending time with her anymore, i told her the reason we don't go on dates and we don't travel like we used to is because the baby is our priority now and when he grows up, we'll have all the time in the world to ourselves. 1 year older than I am. I’ll admit it, it fucking sucks. But, I made alot of decisions from then on. my immigrant mother sounds similar to your mom. When she passed; she told me she forgave me for all my transgressions against her. She wasn’t abusive all the time and she had moments of showing care but there was so many times where we never clicked or enjoyed our company and she often abused me physically in my child to teen years and verbally abused me in my later teen years (16-18). edit subscriptions. She told my mom and my mother decided to post all over facebook and tag all our family members and me and tell them I wanted to leave and I hated her and was selfish and blahdiblah. I really want to help her. also having parents with My mom loves me, but I don’t think she really liked me from adolescence on. I have two sons ages 16 and 14 with my ex-wife. Laura's mom is nothing to me and I gain nothing from forgiving her. As for her affair partner (apparently they are still together after his wife caught and divorced him) I have never met him and made it clear to my mother I do not want to. She’s the only mother I will ever have. For some reason I didnt want to know and i turned heel and ran all the way back to my house and shut myself My girlfriend previous to her; my first girlfriend, I loved much more. Let her I read your dad makes you respond to your mother, and I don’t agree but until you are 18, give her the bare minimum if you feel like it. Plus what to do about it. I tell my mom I love her almost every day, and have my whole life. She likes my two younger siblings better. Say hi. I try to live through example, kindness to all. So I got very reluctant to saying stuff. my subreddits. I'm just going to tell her what I've said in this post when I see her. My mom went back to college late in life, so when I was 15 In case this story gets deleted/removed: AITAH for telling my mom that I will respect my dad's gf more than my step-dad. A: I don't want to look like her because I don't like her. Goodbyes fucking sucks. But not telling mom/dad about periods is not a thought that has crossed my mind. Also, I’m 51 & my daughter is 22. We live in a pretty remote rural area right now (my high school has literally like 50 students), and it’s like an hour drive to the nearest urgent care even. we don’t have a great relationship, she’s the main reason for my therapy. That’s a tough one for me personally. It sucks that you don't get to have that unconditional love, I know what it feels like, but things get a little easier for you when you start to low your expectations and stop caring about whatever she says. I do think you need to end it. This seems like something a person would remember. my father bought me pads everytime he saw I was running low, without being I don't plan on completely shutting my mom out when I move out I still want to keep in touch with her, I just don't want to live with her anymore. I don't condone cheating, but having been the one blamed before when I told a cheated on person what happened (including losing a friend I really thought I was close to because she decided even though her boyfriend admitted I was telling the truth that surely I really just wanted to hook up with her trash can man. As im typing this i notice that it is realy hard for me to talk about my reasons of not loving my mother anymore My mother tells me I don’t love her and uses it to turn arguments around where she becomes the victim. I understand what she's saying but I honestly don't know if any future husband or kids would make me forget my parents if they died. I hate her because since she gave birth to me, apparently I was at a disadvantage with her monster daughter, for something that I couldn't control. I wish English were better about these things. I chose the school on the opposite side of the country. We won't have the face any of the negative consequences that result from your decisions to handle her, or experience any of the tiny moments of joy you'll have from positive experiences with her. Internet Culture (Viral) Amazing Your reason to break up with her is you don't love her and want a platonic relationship. We haven’t had the best year, and we’ve had our share of problems. It just made me angry. My father stepped up and filled I told my mom I don't love her today I actually told her that I don't believe in love and that she's a fool for thinking that unconditional love exists. Say what you feel. ” Dad: “You were just for her too. I can love both my mom and dad despite their failures. The problem is that my mother has a bit of a shopping addiction and, several times a week, goes to the mall or shopping plaza and buys hordes of random stuff for both herself and, often, me — sweaters, pyjamas, shirts, keychains, phone cases, and even underwear. As I've gotten older I've started to see a resemblance to her, and I hate it honestly. my dad was pretty clear about it. She’s been working since she started University. I hate my mom. You could tell her that it's fine if she doesn't say I love you back right away, but you'd like to know where she stands in regards to her feelings. It wasn’t a ONS. Just to feel what it feels like to know that you won't be seeing any messages or hearing any calls from her. My mother also told me, even younger, that I was a 'surprise'. I absolutely fell in love with her. Your actions showed that you don’t care about them and you don’t love them. We’re all about families. " It hurt my feelings. ” I still love my mother and I don't want to cut her out completely but this is as close as I want her and I will never again have a close relationship with her. Also it feels like I will disappoint my daughter when I break up with her mom. But I also hate her. My Dad declined quickly without her. We don't cuddle anymore, we did on my birthday but that's it, no more cute nicknames for me except for special guy (it's like they all got transferred to her daughters), no more gifts and the worst part is she doesn't come to my games anymore. 24K votes, 4. I’m broken. Growing up I would call my mom by her first name than as I grew up I realized it was weird calling her by that so I just stopped calling her anything when talking to her. The friend had a maternal grandmother who basically took the role of mother. out and said that I had no reason to move out and I'd just be wasting my money when I could just continue living with her and my stepdad. And b) I have too much pride to ask for anything else. Be strong and don't budge. It's just how I grew up, that you always say "i love you" as part of a goodbye. I do love them. true. My mom is the opposite. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. I am a 26-year-old woman who has a close relationship with both of her parents. I was 12 (26 now). I really don’t know what to do, any advice would be great. I don't care about your mom's intentions. My Mum died on Mother’s Day 2020. Focus on yourself, when she sees you don’t need her she’s gonna start reaching out to try and get you wishing for her approval but don’t fall for it. The first person to see me approach was her mother who just burst into tears before I could ask what had happened. Married for 7. We have 3 young kids. Is this normal? I do love you, right? I wouldn't do anything to hurt you - your so precious to me. However, if I did that would be because he is my dad. It's probably more to do with him, rather than an issue with you. That I have always been loyal to my sister. She how she met my friend at the grocery store. She would never admit it to him. I don't have anywhere to go. And you This question came out of nowhere and I told her I never remembered having that conversation with her. But also I don’t see what a conversation can do as I don’t think that OP is entirely reasonable. Perhaps you want to believe that you love them, but you don’t. He knows he's heading out for something that could get him killed ("I'm fixin' to do somethin dumber then hell, but I'm going anyways. He said to me: “I just don’t have anything to live for anymore. I don’t know if I love her or not. She moved across the country so I don’t see her I don't remember him ever loving me - I was always too stubborn for his tastes, even as a child - but my sister is six years younger than me and so I got to witness him utterly loving her in the first few years of her life and that love turning to the same contempt he's always had for me the second she grew an actual personality. 6K comments. I didn’t want to lie but I’ve seen enough movies/scenarios that if I told her the truth it would crush her. My mom’s friend has a daughter. **I am NOT OP. For example, with clothes shopping (a, don’t go shopping together). I had a conversation with my fiancée Sarah. If not this won’t stop, and obviously they have intimacy issues that need to be worked out. You said it yourself. But I don’t have to put up with her shit. I would call her once a week to check in. I don't even feel like having sex with her, because everything just feel the same. ’ Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. Someone you told me she was jealous that my dad moved on. I’m really hurt and confused and don’t know what to say and how to feel. I told her Rylee might be like a daughter to her now but she's not like a sister to me. I felt this. Well, I don't know what to say. I don't care if she uses the excuse that her mom did worse for her. 1K votes, 103 comments. I’ve wished so many times for her to not exist - and I’ve voiced that to professionals and been told it’s a completely normal My mom and her bf went out to eat a few hours before I got to town and it was just the two of them. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I might be an asshole for telling my stepsister that I don't love her as much because she was being very rude i feel i could’ve written this post. Your mom is not behaving like a mom, she's behaving like a child. I've talked with her, nothing. He’s a fine person, but I only hug people I’m very close to and I haven’t seen him much as an adult (saw him once a year as a child). Gaming. We don't cuddle anymore, we did on my birthday but that's it, no more cute nicknames for me except for special guy (it's like they all got transferred to her daughters), no more gifts and the worst part is she doesn't come to my games anymore I really, really love my mom. my father bought me pads everytime he saw I was running low, without being I told my mom that I don't owe my stepsister loyalty just because my sister has my loyalty. Even with other siblings, life was hard. When I tell her I feel like my friends don’t like me, she’ll say “Of course they don’t. These are human emotions and actions. Not if she's not by your side when you need her. You’ll be alright. My poor mother. i don’t tell my mom those kinda things so i felt really good when she told me this. Trigger warning: Infidelity, mentions of alcoholism, depression mood spoiler: hopeful Original - 22 March 2023 . I do love and support my sister because she is a good person who does the same for me in her own ways. There is no attraction. well my mom tried her darndest and I was born and my sister a year later. Make it. (if they already know why you don't need to tell them but if they don't tell them this) That's because I feel really uncomfortable being close to people like that. I mean, I get not telling your parents about your friends or school or grades. There's really nothing that can't be solved by just being honest and open. I then told my piece. That has to stop. You don’t treat people you love the way you treated her children. My mom didn't have any Maternal figure in her life after my grandmother died. Let's talk in person later tonight. I think maybe why your mom gets angry when you tell her why you don't like spending time with her is because she's looking for a specific answer or for a reason to lash out at you and pretend like things are your fault. We don’t even sleep in the same bed at this point. To OP, you can love your brother but you are not ( should not ) give up your happiness and wellbeing for him. Now that I'm older I do spend time with my cousin and my aunt and I don't care if my mom hates it. I think that the fact your mom urgent demanded you to give a SPECIFIC answer to "do you not love me," combined with the fact she must know there's a reason why you went NC for now 2+ years, meant that if she didn't want the truth, then why ask for that specific set-up to be hurt by your answer? Her DMs, two days worth because I don't really use my Facebook, consistented of her saying I abandoned her when she needed me most, that she's practically a single mom, her husband (my ex) hates her and got with a woman that looks like me, our parents blame her for me leaving and won't help her, and the entire family treats her kid like crap for being the product of an affair. ” Yeah no, this is several layers of bullshit. Thanks for sharing <3 I hope you and your father are doing great <3 Basically he told my mom that if anyone is leaving it’s going to be her and her daughter prematurely(we ended up leaving) because he’s sick of her ruining everyone’s relationships and lives over my sister career, I think I heard him say he get some shit at work too but I did clearly heard him say he wants a divorce don’t know if it was the heat of the moment or if he’s serious In school I would be asked stuff and be laughed at. Mine was my dad tho. There are reasons. I don’t want to talk to her anymore. If we don't call, we usually text each other goodnight and that we love each other. At a certain point my mother was imploring me to spend time with her but I I told my mom, thinking she'd be supportive and help me make an appointment. I NEVER told my mom anything (I even managed to game my way into not having to tell my parents when I got caught smoking on school grounds and got in school suspension) and I went through those years so scared and feeling alone and if I’d just trusted my mom maybe I We both cried. My dad asked me why I was acting this way and why I won’t give her a chance. My stepmother called me her daughter but clearly didn’t want me around & wasn’t loving towards me like a mother. I don’t know how I can put into words how much I love her, or even really explain why. I do all the things I'm supposed to - I feed her, I change her, I bath her, I hold her when she cries - she is never neglected, and I don't enjoy a single second I’ve been dating this girl for about 2 years, it’s the first relationship i’ve had that’s lasted more than 4 months so i’m more attached to her than anyone else i’ve ever been with. I don't know if it's because she was my first or if my love for you isn't real. I love my mom and I'm deeply disturbed by the things I've mentioned here. I hope that feeling of deep devotion, never leaves you. You can block or mute her, even if it is just temporary. Looking for some advice. I made sure to tell her I would keep in contact. I’m having a difficult jump to content. I’m sad. I know most of the stuff I said. Are you worried your mom doesn't love you? Look for these 13 tell-tale signs that your mom doesn't love you. If she keeps up, walk away. Don't worry there's nothing wrong with me or you guys. My mom passed when I was 4- so I don't really have a concept of her. It is her responsibility to keep your mental health decent and her responsibility to stop generational trauma. AITA for telling my wife that my mom will never love her to stop trying. Being cold and ignoring your child isn’t ok. No. Love isn't rational it's a feeling, if you want to share your feelings with her you should. My logic, which I shared with her, being that if she wasn't telling her mom about every single perfect day we have together (99% of the time, our days are fantastic), she shouldn't tell her mom about every single imperfect day either, because those minor negative stories will tend to stick moreso than the positive ones, and her parents could begin to have a skewed perception of 14K votes, 2. Do I love her -> do I want to tell her that I love her -> Tell her. Or check it out in the app stores Don't get me wrong - I don't want to harm her or myself, I would never do that. The thing is: it has always been difficult for me to say things like that to other people. Thanks Mom Love your Mom. I don’t blame her but I will always hate the moment my dad gave me that “talk”. I don't think acting disgusted or telling her that OP is gay will help because: if OP's mom respects OP's boundaries and this was a misunderstanding, then OP isn't in danger. she also mentioned i was special to her because she said she loves her sleep but since i work 3rd shift she stayed up for me so we could talk because we didn’t get to talk much during Yes always respect the mum unwritten law #1 She squeezed you out fed you and this is called tough love so what you got angry over chores and kids always get called "lazy" if you dont respect your elders you aint going places you need to learn to respect those older than you especially one that straight up gave birth to you fed you put a roof over your head etc and obviously your I wish my mother was willing to admit her inability to love. When I was thirteen, I told my grandmother I wanted to leave. So they already got to celebrate together. Or have any sex. Maybe OP’s bored. Some women do have a maternal figure in their lives after their mother dies. I told mom because my sister and I are siblings, close siblings, as well as friends, and I love her. She will always be a part of my family through that connection. Her parents warned him as well and he did tell my mother about their warning. So yesterday my friend (with who I plan on sharing an apartment) and I were looking at apartments and we found one that we love, it's in a nice area, has a lot of space and You said something unforgivable about her kids. She clearly does not deserve you or your siblings, if you have any. it's been almost 10 years, I don't need a mom anymore! My dad was a little. Relationships are hard. If anyone emphasizes family love and bonds, it’s freakin Mormons. I don't believe her bio dad admitted to straight up rape. I'm turning 30 in 3 weeks :) Tried to tell her she's manipulative but obviously I was accused of being wrong once again. If she's feeling insecure or worried about the future, that's fair enough, but she has to say that, not tell you you don't love her. I love my mom but it just kinda came out I wish I was never This friend would tell my mom that she wished that her mother was like my grandmother. Now its like a good morning message and FT good night for 5 minutes. Right now my mom is doing better bit by bit so her questions aren't interrogations anymore. ” Me: “You still have friends, family, kidsyou know I’m still here for you. And everything else that changed with her just dipping like that sucks too. My mom told me about my periods at 11 years old, my grandmother bought me pads. She doesn’t talk to her mom to this day 20 years later. I’m hurt. I have to live in a trust that she loved me, that I carry attributes that are alike well , all that changed when i was at thanksgiving dinner and keep in mind i never see my mom. You kind of need to accept that she’s always gonna be like that. She’s not perfect. Valheim She said that I was being selfish for not going because it would show my grandma that I don't love "Tell my mother I love her" - - - I might die tonight. She didn't say "I love you but I don't like you" to me but so my sister. Don't have any answers for you, who is dealing with something similar. but it just She wanted to recreate the same picture except this time it was with my step-dad. That I don't have to be loyal to Rylee just because I'm loyal to my sister. I'm still mad at my mom and I grown for the time I told I told my mother I had social anxiety we were in a restaurant sitting down and the waitress came to serve us and she yelled at me in a restaurant full of people you need to say to her your order and said play dumb and crazy on your own time she got up and walked out I was scared humiliated In No Country for Old Men, Llewelyn is talking to Carla Jean, and he says 'if I don't make it back, tell my mother I love her,' and she responds, 'your mother is dead Llewelyn. however, i decided to go because my dad and i are close and he invited me. Don't tell people you don't want to talk about it. The racial dynamics here complicate the HELL out of this situation. She told me I was saying horrible I've had a very similar situation with my mom. So, their argument was that my mom was basically obsessed with my dad's gf and has been stalking her. There were pictures of dad and her too. I told my dad that if he tells her then that's on him. Even if it means taking the lost income, I’m thinking about going back. My therapist recently told me that anger towards my mom is completely healthy and expected. I told her I was going to do my best to tell her more and she understands when I want to keep more private things to myself. Or check it out in the app stores If i could go back in time i would change everything, i would hug her, tell her how much i love her every single night and spend so much more time with her. she’s currently a senior @ an HBCU & is also in STEM and a sorority that volunteers weekly in our city. She said I make her feel like shit and that I don't make her feel like I really care I’ve reached out to a few recruiters tonight. There’s definitely I don't really know them, especially because my mom stopped coming over as much after they were born. My therapist told me I shouldn't have to pick sides. We weren't a family basically since I was little, it felt like we all Today was the day that i had to reveal to her that i dont love her anymore. he gave my mom a year to get pregnant and if not then no kids. I know that if anything So it just feels like I'm wasting her time and mine by sticking around. I barely talk to my father and my mom is incredibly manipulative and verbally abusive (paired with an extreme anxiety disorder). I told him that she’s young enough to be my sister and I don’t want anything to do with the person he was cheating on my mother with nor do I want anything to do with the baby he had on my mother while she was battling cancer. I just found out she has been cheating on me. They married when I was 7 and the complaints started when I was 15. I also have a decent-paying job and I would be able to support myself. off and soon after moving in with him, I contacted my lawyer and asked to be put in a foster home, when I was 15. "), and he's steeling himself to it, putting his mind where it needs to be so he can come back in one piece. I just don’t like her. From reading both of your posts (this one and the one you posted before), your mom sounds exactly like my own mom: "I'm-always-right-and-you're-always-wrong-because-I-am-older-than-you" mentality, twisting words, playing victim; trying to distance me away from my friends and other people outside our own core family, because "they are temporary and can easily betray And my mom is so sensitive that she starts fights with my little sister just because of it all and over tiny little things. I know what I said was dismissive and might kinda cold under the circumstances of what both families went through and the fact Rylee found out her mom is Basically he told my mom that if anyone is leaving it’s going to be her and her daughter prematurely(we ended up leaving) because he’s sick of her ruining everyone’s relationships and lives over my sister career, I think I heard him say he get some shit at work too but I did clearly heard him say he wants a divorce don’t know if it was the heat of the moment or if he’s serious And for a while, I enjoyed this too, but it started getting annoying although I never directly told her anything. I was a tortured kid trying to gain her approval and love. ) I'm not sure i kind of get how you feel with that, my mom didnt cheat, she passed away and my dad said he would never say "i love you" to another woman, to my knowledge 7 years after her passing he still hasn't my dad has also aged in his face and personality me and my dad used to fight constantly and really bad but since my mom isnt around we have gotten an understanding that i I think only you can judge your mom and what kind of relationship you want to have to her. - 28 October 2021 I had a child when I was 16 and I am not with her father and quite honestly don't know where he is. She told me she met him several times after I told her I knew. And her indifference to your crying makes my heart break for you. For all the people telling me my kids don’t love me and I’m a waste of space, idk guys, just remember I’m an My father admitted to me at 16 that 'some people aren't meant to be parents'. i’ve been lucky to have had access to YEARS of therapy (i’m talking since 4th grade) and only about three days ago i finally realized it doesn’t matter if they are our mother- love does not entail things like causing someone to fear eternal damnation for I love and miss mom, I want to see her, hug her, have her tell me a story, prepare food for her. But for the life of me I cannot say those words to them. I can’t change it. Because it looked like she wanted to replace my dad with a homewrecker. My grandma grew up with a reasonably happy life. Everything I did, I did for her. I don't hate my ex. oh babes. My family was in such pain when she died, that they bottled it all upwhat they could have shared, they buried deep within themselves. Don't get into protracted conversations where you endlessly reassure her. I just don't feel any love towards her. If I did y not care, I would not care to listen. I repeated myself maybe 3 times, and the last time I told her it was the last time I would ask. But I couldn't. You need to be honest with your mom and tell her that you are not sexually attracted to her and Even if I don't like them at that moment, my love never waivers. Update - posted 9 days ago Update: I told my fiancée that I don't really want to marry her anymore. She has only ever loved me for the things I did for her and once that stopped, she My mom cried and she took me back to my dad’s and we argued the whole way and eventually I told her “I hate you and I wish you were never my mom”. That’s literally gonna make you feel worse. If you have a tough decision to make. OP should just buy a Corvette like every other middle age male going through a midlife crisis. She got quiet and we didn’t say It's sounds like you don't like your mother right now, and do not enjoy the time you spend with her. I don't plan on completely shutting my mom out when I move out I still want to keep in touch with her, I just don't want to live with her anymore. Look I know you tell me that you love me every day and I don't answer back. She loves to tell me i buy clothes like an old woman and have no taste. Or check it out in the app stores TOPICS. (my dad is the problem) if we try to tell her we don’t like her fighting with us just because she is mad at dad she starts getting upset saying she is a horrible mom and she should go kill herself. She can be upset and angry if she wants to. WIth foods, she doesn’t respect that I have different tastes than her, and says I don’t recognize “good Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. Identify those and save your energy. “I just fell out of love and don’t know why. I warned him about her, I warned him about the abuse she inflicted on us kids and others and her drug abuse. Like none. Tell her and everyone else that. but she has a life outside of the home. Plus she's the mother of my children and always will be. My mom loves to buy me clothes that are not my taste. If she accuses you of not liking her food, tell her YES, I prefer different foods and different style of cooking. If you don't know, my mom died last year and well I wanted to kill myself too. I can actually remember the last time I said "I love you" to my mom. My husband who has been parenting my daughter for 10 years doesn't want to adopt her after she asked him to be her dad for real and I don't know what to do about our marriage. And humans aren’t perfect. Others don't. What might make me a jerk for the whole talk is I know my mom is trying to make us all a family and I know she badly wants it to work. Our marriage reached a bitter end when I learned she had remained married to me for over three years so I would support her through returning to school so she could switch careers to an even better paying one, despite her old one paying as much as mine. My relationship with my parents was bad for a while (years 13-23) but is decent now. I put I didn't confront my mom yet. I am 37 now. But it sounds like you love her the way you would love a friend or family member. she said her moms been trying to get her to get with a guy for a while. tl;dr: don’t really want to tell my mom about my No one on Reddit can tell you what is absolutely best for you in relation to your personal relationship with your mom. I know she doesn’t love me. Ok, time to call my mom and tell her I love her. Idk why I still love her I’m so lost on what to do next. Lately I’ve been acting a little weird/distant bc of feeling conflicted and I think she’s catching on. Backstory: My (17F) mom (45F) cheated on my dad (46M) 7 years ago with my My [M, 21] gf [F, 18] says I don't love her. I moved out of the foster home and back in If you've told her you don't want to hear her friends' opinions on your career, next time she does it, hold up a hand and say 'Mum, stop! We agreed that you wouldn't do this. Does he forget because he's caught up in the severity of what he's about to do? Or is a joke that goes over her head? My mom started her complaints with my dad when I was about 15. A house, etc. Or be sweet to one another. I don't want to hear it'. I didn't share my feelings of leaving her with the enemy since those are for me to deal. 3K comments. After KNOWING the facts. She told me I should be standing by my family aka Hannah and that I am holding her behavior as a young kid against her too much. I do love my mom but it is just not the same That must feel so lonely. Then stay at home. A mother's love is actually one of the best things in the world. My mom never even told me to stop hanging out with Samantha. when our parents don’t foster a safe environment for us to approach them about these things as children, they seem to not understand we can’t just “switch on” and suddenly share things after being beaten and screamed at for years. My step-dad said it's best that I do not speak to her for a while because she clearly has some issues of her own. You don't have to. She continued to sit. My mom didn’t want to spend time with her boring annoying kids when she could be with her friends getting drunk, high, you can think it she probably did it. Also the insurance I’m on sucks and I need her to help me with the co-pay. You don’t love them. Don't take shit from her. Both of my grandparents lived out of state. my daughter & I are very close. I was You're correct, narcissistic people don't really want to listen. Do this for everything that you have already told her that you want her to stop doing. I almost see my mom as a stranger and My mom caught wind of it and told me that since I also work that I don’t need the full 10k and that I should kick some cash in bucket to my parents since we’re in a recession and my dad needs more workers for our farm and that she and my dad deserve to be compensated after raising me for 18 years looking back that last part was ment to probably be a joke on her end. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. I spent more time with my friends and girlfriend. Then I am forced to pretend to be an adult, and that my mother's doting doesn't embarrass me. I don't hate her. " She's been blowing up my phone with texts and missed calls ever since. the thing that he always said was that he is just not a kid person but that he would be there for Soon You'll Get Better is about her mom. Please be kind when mentioning her in any comments. Don't let her use that to control you and what you eat, or make you feel guilty. But she said that she liked it bc I don’t express that to her very often and I shouldn’t have to hide how I feel from her. Also, stop calling her texting her altogether. I never told Laura that I didn't love her enough to tolerate her mom at the wedding. I do love her, but I know we can not be with each other & we are not right for each other, she is a severe narcissist & I can’t live & be with someone who never takes my feelings into consideration an who tells me I’m evil, white trash, that I don’t provide for her, takes all my secrets an uses them against me, I love her unconditionally I was that 15 year old. she feels bad for us growing up in poverty and now that she lives comfortably she wants to make up for it. If they tell you to try and understand her point of view, tell them you're the kid and she's the parent. There My mom expected me to step in and "be Hannah's sister and her friend" and we have fought about it a lot. Maybe they won’t break up, you never know. I’m sure it was awkward for him too, but I told my mom “You don’t tell a 40 year old woman to hug someone. BTW my mom , i love her but she’s A NARC. And then, I jokingly said "are you going to say you don't love me just because you have already met the love of your life?", to which he replied "you're absolutely right, I do love you. She told me everything. It seems like you are getting a grasp on the traits she has that bother you and where they I’m getting married in less than 2 months and it’s blatantly obvious to me that my mom doesnt like my future wife. Don’t be malicious, but if she says she loves you and you don’t feel like saying it back, don’t. It's the only way she's going Reddit advices really helped me a lot and the comments made my husband see the truth in other people’s perspective. I don’t think you should call yourself her bonus mom if you don’t love her or enjoy her being around. She's really hard to please and I feel really guilty. Tell her you know which guy and that if she doesn’t come clean to your dad, that you will have to tell him. I have a feeling that she will survive. every time i came near her, she’d I can relate. I felt bad about this for a long time and tried to force it. since the beginning we’ve had little problems about the differences in our personalities, well they turned into big differences and it’s why i want to break up with her she never wants to do any of the things i I don't want meds or anything I just want my mom to love me like she used to again. This grew so much that I started lying to her about responsibilities just so she'd leave me alone. '. That's not nothing. You didn't do anything wrong and that is something a parent should NEVER EVER say to their child. My mom was speechless I don’t know if I broke her heart or simply caught her by surprise. Dating She always talks about how much she loves me and how much she has invested in me and she says I don't make her feel loved. I must love you, right? Why don't I get the same butterflies I got from my past lover? Anyways recently my gf (23 F) told me (25 M) that she loves me. Whenever my mom wants to go away for a holiday she’ll always invite my daughter to go with her. I sleep over every now and then. I remember calling home one time, before cell phones and caller ID were a big thing, and when she heard my voice she excitedly said “Hi sweetie!” My mom would say she loves me and I would say I love her but we have zero relationship. I do not feel like as she is obligated to listen to me because she is my mom, so I don't force my words onto her because I can tell she does not care. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. So I told my mom that I found a place and that I'm moving out and she began to get extremely I don't really know them, especially because my mom stopped coming over as much after they were born. I don't think I've ever had this much connection with any woman. Love my mom, she’s an angel. I used to love my job and was always home by 4:30. Trust me. Don’t love her, don’t even like her. We text or 2. But you are right that it won't make the relationship work. You telling your son that you don't like him very much opened his eyes to his behavior. Maybe she still feels awkward about the whole situation. Oh family is FOREVER. My mom loves my daughter, even though she is the most difficult grandchild, because my daughter loves hanging out with my mom. I said I have never been attracted to her and I felt really shocked and betrayed by this, I told her to forget that the conversation ever happened and walked out. She talks too much to retail employees about stuff they probably don’t care about. My mom is like that. When I heard she was moving I thought I'd fo a favor to my friend and have her live with me for a while. 3 years later I still visit every week if possible. I don't know. They just want to be right and feel superior. But not every woman who gives birth deserves to be called a mother. It is not your job to make her like you, you are the child and she is the parent no matter how you cut it. I don't even feel an ounce of jealousy when she tell me a guy tried to hit She's told me she brushes her teeth but there's no evidence. My GF offered to not come and to be dropped off with her dad while I go out with my mom so it isn’t awkward, but my mom indented on bringing him regardless of whether my gf came or not. Whenever I say something my mom has a different opinion on, she says I don't respect her, hangs up the phone or says 'other people don't talk like that to their parents' and I should be ashamed. i’m sorry that you had to experience that. uzhkne lvgx otgibapo hha yjifn exjers ufzmcfxz fcve awab jltm